Quotes by Will Cuppy

“ Young normal tigers do not eat people. If eaten by a tiger you may rest assured he was abnormal. “

-Will Cuppy-

Young normal tigers do not eat people. If eaten by a tiger you may rest assured he was abnormal.

A few Cobras in your home will soon clear it of Rats and Mice. Of course, you will still have the Cobras.

We all make mistakes, but intelligence enables us to do it on purpose.

The trouble with the dictionary is that you have to know how a word is spelled before you can look it up to see how it is spelled.

Aristotle was famous for knowing everything. He taught that the brain exists merely to cool the blood and is not involved in the process of thinking. This is true only of certain persons.

Just when you're beginning to think pretty well of people, you run across somebody who puts sugar on sliced tomatoes.

Some people lose all respect for the lion unless he devours them instantly. There is no pleasing some people.

The Dodo never had a chance. He seems to have been invented for the sole purpose of becoming extinct and that was all he was good for.

Etiquette means behaving yourself a little better than is absolutely essential.

If an animal does something, we call it instinct; if we do the same thing for the same reason, we call it intelligence.

Never call anyone a baboon unless you are sure of your facts.

Introducing Will Cuppy

Will Cuppy (1884–1949) was an American humorist and literary critic known for his witty, satirical writings about nature and historical figures. Born in Auburn, Indiana, he spent much of his early life exploring the natural world, which later inspired books like How to Tell Your Friends from the Apes (1931) and How to Attract the Wombat (1949). Cuppy’s most famous work, The Decline and Fall of Practically Everybody (1950), a humorous take on historical figures, was published after his death and became a bestseller. A reclusive figure, he lived as a hermit on Jones Island for years, earning fame with How to Be a Hermit (1929). Despite battling depression, his sharp, dark humor left a lasting mark on American satire.